Are you a man?? Are you a man looking to ‘come up’? Are you allergic to regular work?? Are you white?? Are you willing to wear braids? Are you willing to screw trailor trash? Are you a breeder?? If you said yes to at least two of the preceeding questions, a new ideal has emerged. From out of the darkness of upstage. Through the throbbing beats *I’m a slaaaaave*, he has come to be an example for your kind. Did he do it through hard work? Did he really want to be a role model? We’ll never know. At least not until the VH1’s 2007 Edition of Celebrity Break-Ups.
Who’s the luckiest schmoe this side of MTV?? Who might not even have Platinum Pac (Not to be confused with Platinum Yak), but a Pac well worth millions?? We at Kajuana, LLC. have decided that Brit, I can call her Brit cus we’re cool like that, fell in trailer trash love with Kevin because he was the first man to get her to the O (and I don’t mean Overstock.com). Not only did she fall head over ass in love with him, she married him, and gave him another spawn! I’d say he was a lucky bastard!!!! By the way, aside from dancing, has Kevin ever held down a regular job?? Is he currently paying child support for his other babies?? Better yet, is Brit paying support for those kids?
Kevin had to have blown her mind. Why else would she throw caution to the wind, go against the advice I’m sure someone gave her, marry him, sans prenumptual agreement?? Speaking of mind blowing, I think what Kevin did works and is the main reason men want inexperienced women. That and to avoid the stigma attached to publicly having a relationship (not just relations) with sluts…And you know what? My mother was undone about how this 23 year old white girl was behaving at work. I tried to explain to her that in some cultures (white ones) being a slut isn’t all that negative. Hooking up is all the rage. And in the future, most white men won’t look crossed eyed at her. I don’t know why I tell my mother these things. Probably because she’s shocked to the point that I can’t help but chuckle, lots!
Back to men and virgin-esque women. See, no matter how NOT Platinum the man’s Pac is, an inexperienced women will be happy. He can be wack and she still think he’s the greatest thing since the Easy Bake Oven!! So then really, the desire for an inexperienced woman, I’m talking long-term not a f*cking for sport situation, stems from the man’s insecurites. And by insecurities, I mean him knowing his shyt is less than Platinum!
Kevin has proven to me that if a gigalo type man really wants to come up, he needs to find a rich girl who hasn’t had any great (s)ex. Ladies, think about your firsts (sex and O). They may or may not be the same guy. Wasn’t your mind a little blown? Tell the truth. Blown I tell you. Now imagine if you were wealthy and this man, from the jump, meant you no good!! You’d be broke as a crackhead right now.
ED NOTE: Eric Bennett is the exact opposite of Kevin!!! Eric had a good thing but let it slip away. Neither are role models but at least Kevin has been far more successful than Eric.
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